My life with an Eating disorder. This blog is my distraction and journal of Pro-ana
Showing posts with label Pro Ana. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Pro Ana. Show all posts
27 June 2012
Three steps
12 January 2012
just say NO diet
I find that the hardest thing for me is bingeing and temptation. I will occasionaly go and raid the fridge and eat a shit load of food when im having a bad day. But thats how i got fat, from comfort eating.
So i have to sometimes stop myself, and its hard especially when im surrounded by people and family who expect me to dish up a whole plate of food. They seem to notice when one month you"re eating and the next month you cringe even at the mention of food.
So self control is my challenge. And if i do binge on that one occasion, i get really depressed and starve myself for two days while i increase my workouts and try to get rid of everything i ate and more. When i eat i feel disgusting and fat and i cant help hating myslef.
Some people think that not eating is torture, but eating is more of a torture to me.
The just say NO diet is simple. when you want food, say no. When you're surrounded by food, just say no, when you're offered food, just say no. Saying no, and self control is what us ana girls are built for. And hopefully, as the time goes by, saying no becomes a reflex and we no longer wish we were skinny enough to say yes.
25 November 2011
facts and myths
Myth: Pro-Ana prays to anorexia.
Reality: There is reference to a religion of sorts that exsists on pro-ana websites, with several referrals of the name "Ana" mentioned. But people, mainly the media and anti's get confused and spread the misinformation that Ana refers to anorexia. The name Ana in the religious conotation actually is the full name Anamadim, and not some goddess named anorexia. The orgin of Anamadim was the creation of a site by the name of Underground Grotto, where there is even a summoning spell to invoke Anamadim. However there is an extremely slim (no pun intended) minority of those on pro-ana sites that partake in this religious style activity. This also has nothing to do with the letters, creeds, commandments, ect. either (see below for that information). It has nothing to do with the huge majority of pro-ana.
Myth: The entire pro-ana religion.
Reality: The pro-ana religion seen on many pro-ana sites was never created by any pro-ana site at all. All the creeds, letters, comandments are all made by professional psychologists in an attempt to make the mindset of the anorexic views be seen through their eyes. This was seen as a powerful message, and to those who are anorexic and wanting to go further into it, seen these messages as motivation instead of the reverse that it was intended to be. It's funny how those that hate pro-ana unwittingly gave it a religion isn't it? Not too many want that be known, and no wonder. Big opps eh? Just so you know, that is their writings if you ever see and/or use it.
Myth: Tips and tricks
Reality: Yeah, you may be on the pro-ed sites looking for some new way to hide something, do it better or if there is something better than what your doing now. But if your parents, relatives, loved ones, co-workers or whoever you are trying to hide it from are thinking you have an eating disorder ... guess what? They are on the same sites you are on reading the same tips and tricks. They may help for a little while, but sooner or later (or already) the one you are hiding it from are going to find out. The sites are real easy to find, but it makes the "T's" that much more in-effective. As they say, you can run but you can't hide.
Myth: Pro-Ana is Pro Death
Reality: If you ever been on a pro-ana forum before, you will notice that alot of the long term members are of a normal to ever so slightly below normal weight range. There is very few long termers that are in the medical anorexic weight range. So true they are thin, but in reality terms, they are in fact normal. In fact many of the extreme thin don't frequent pro-ed forums at all, they are on support forums instead. Of those that get to an extreme level who post pics and weights, are replied back with messages of concern and pleas for them to take care of themselves and to not loose any more weight. Now you have to actually be ON the forums to know this, but those who cry out the evils do not do very good research into what they are talking about. You could say that pro-ana is alot more pro-support leaning than it lets on too.
Myth: Pro-Ana is teaching others to become anorexic
Reality: You cannot "become" anorexic, it is not something you choose like a diet, anorexia chooses you and in the lottery of anorexia winning is loosing more than you know. It's outside factors in your own enviornment that make one eating disordered, not text and pictures on a website. To those that think you can become "ana" ... it won't happen. You may skip a few meals, fast for a few days but that does not make you anorexic at all. Much like a drag queen, you can look act talk walk and sing every bit like Cher ... but you are not Cher. It's simple as that.
Myth: Pro-Ana encourages you to stay anorexic
Reality: This is the touchy one. We don't encourage you to stay anorexic, but this is the biggest way in which we differ from the professional and pro-recovery sites. Instead of treating a disorder itself, pro-ana treats the person. We get to know the individual, what makes them laugh, smile, cry and scared to see what their world is like through their eyes. See, like I said before, eating disorders are a deep rooted problem and there is no point trying to get rid of something that will just come back again instantly. To get rid of this, one must get to the main root and work from there. Once the root is gone, the consequense of eating disorders are that much easier to recover from ... and the process will be a lasting one. This is why the most important part of any ed forum is the journal area.
Reality: There is reference to a religion of sorts that exsists on pro-ana websites, with several referrals of the name "Ana" mentioned. But people, mainly the media and anti's get confused and spread the misinformation that Ana refers to anorexia. The name Ana in the religious conotation actually is the full name Anamadim, and not some goddess named anorexia. The orgin of Anamadim was the creation of a site by the name of Underground Grotto, where there is even a summoning spell to invoke Anamadim. However there is an extremely slim (no pun intended) minority of those on pro-ana sites that partake in this religious style activity. This also has nothing to do with the letters, creeds, commandments, ect. either (see below for that information). It has nothing to do with the huge majority of pro-ana.
Myth: The entire pro-ana religion.
Reality: The pro-ana religion seen on many pro-ana sites was never created by any pro-ana site at all. All the creeds, letters, comandments are all made by professional psychologists in an attempt to make the mindset of the anorexic views be seen through their eyes. This was seen as a powerful message, and to those who are anorexic and wanting to go further into it, seen these messages as motivation instead of the reverse that it was intended to be. It's funny how those that hate pro-ana unwittingly gave it a religion isn't it? Not too many want that be known, and no wonder. Big opps eh? Just so you know, that is their writings if you ever see and/or use it.
Myth: Tips and tricks
Reality: Yeah, you may be on the pro-ed sites looking for some new way to hide something, do it better or if there is something better than what your doing now. But if your parents, relatives, loved ones, co-workers or whoever you are trying to hide it from are thinking you have an eating disorder ... guess what? They are on the same sites you are on reading the same tips and tricks. They may help for a little while, but sooner or later (or already) the one you are hiding it from are going to find out. The sites are real easy to find, but it makes the "T's" that much more in-effective. As they say, you can run but you can't hide.
Myth: Pro-Ana is Pro Death
Reality: If you ever been on a pro-ana forum before, you will notice that alot of the long term members are of a normal to ever so slightly below normal weight range. There is very few long termers that are in the medical anorexic weight range. So true they are thin, but in reality terms, they are in fact normal. In fact many of the extreme thin don't frequent pro-ed forums at all, they are on support forums instead. Of those that get to an extreme level who post pics and weights, are replied back with messages of concern and pleas for them to take care of themselves and to not loose any more weight. Now you have to actually be ON the forums to know this, but those who cry out the evils do not do very good research into what they are talking about. You could say that pro-ana is alot more pro-support leaning than it lets on too.
Myth: Pro-Ana is teaching others to become anorexic
Reality: You cannot "become" anorexic, it is not something you choose like a diet, anorexia chooses you and in the lottery of anorexia winning is loosing more than you know. It's outside factors in your own enviornment that make one eating disordered, not text and pictures on a website. To those that think you can become "ana" ... it won't happen. You may skip a few meals, fast for a few days but that does not make you anorexic at all. Much like a drag queen, you can look act talk walk and sing every bit like Cher ... but you are not Cher. It's simple as that.
Myth: Pro-Ana encourages you to stay anorexic
Reality: This is the touchy one. We don't encourage you to stay anorexic, but this is the biggest way in which we differ from the professional and pro-recovery sites. Instead of treating a disorder itself, pro-ana treats the person. We get to know the individual, what makes them laugh, smile, cry and scared to see what their world is like through their eyes. See, like I said before, eating disorders are a deep rooted problem and there is no point trying to get rid of something that will just come back again instantly. To get rid of this, one must get to the main root and work from there. Once the root is gone, the consequense of eating disorders are that much easier to recover from ... and the process will be a lasting one. This is why the most important part of any ed forum is the journal area.
Ana's Creed
I believe in control, the only force mighty enough to bring order in the chaos that is my world.
I believe in oughts, musts and shoulds, as unbreakable laws to determine my daily behaviour.
I believe in perfection and strive to attain it.
I believe in salvation through starvation.
I believe in calorie counters as the inspired word of god, and memorise then accordingly.
I believe in bathroom scales as an indicator of my daily succeses and failures.
I believe in hell, cause sometimes I think I live in it.
I believe in a wholly black an withe world, the losing of weight, recrimination for sins, the alonegation of the body and a life ever fasting.
I believe in oughts, musts and shoulds, as unbreakable laws to determine my daily behaviour.
I believe in perfection and strive to attain it.
I believe in salvation through starvation.
I believe in calorie counters as the inspired word of god, and memorise then accordingly.
I believe in bathroom scales as an indicator of my daily succeses and failures.
I believe in hell, cause sometimes I think I live in it.
I believe in a wholly black an withe world, the losing of weight, recrimination for sins, the alonegation of the body and a life ever fasting.
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